I've always wanted to...

Today I've been thinking about things I've always wanted to do before I get too old or pass on. I guess you would say its like a "Bucket List", but it isn't really major things like travelling places or things to be when I'm all grown up. Its more of the little things.

-Kiss in the back area stacks of a library
-Tap dance on Broadway, the street, to at least be able to say it in truth
-Drive to the mountains for the day just to enjoy the sunset/sunrise
-Date a swimmer
-Go to a party as a completely different person to everyone I meet
-Learn how to ride horseback
-Fly to Ireland to get Irish Lace for my veil when the time comes to get married
-Go one day without saying anything negative
-Cook a three course meal without burning anything and doing more than pouring in the macaroni and adding the cheese
-Get the three tattoos I've designed (Celtic trinity symbol, an anchor with forget-me-nots, and a Martha Graham quote)
-Have the courage to dance on a stage when no one is watching

This is just a start, but I think its good and not too unrealistic:).

A New Start

Its been a very long time since I wrote in this blog, but because I like to keep friends updated and find this cathartic, I want to start again. Right now, my life is everything but bad. It has been horrible at times this year and I've lost a lot of things and at times my mind, but when the light grew brighter, I knew I would be okay. I am okay. And its okay to be just that...okay. Being more is great, but only if I want it that way and only if I'm satisfied with who I am and who I am always growing to be. I don't want to become someone just because others approve or don't approve. I'm finished with that. I might slip up, but I have a lot of ways to make sure I'm doing what I started out doing. 2009 is going to be a great beginning for me and a great re-start in some places! If anything, I am thankful that 2008 has been this way because it has led me to realize more than I ever knew about myself and to know yourself is one of the most important things in life. To be happy with yourself is another and I'm working towards that every day. It gets easier with time and with less discouraging outlooks on my part. Yep, its a new start.

...always.